I know I am not the only person out there that struggles with comparison. Why do we compare ourselves with others? Why can't we be content with who and what we are? The struggle is real here. While I struggle with why I compare myself to others it leads me to do just that, compare myself to those out there who aren't consumed with comparison. It leads me to compare myself to those that are seen as confident and in control.
I decided to do some reading today to see if I can find an answer to all of my questions. I wonder - do you find that as humorous as I do? I don't know that I will ever find the answer to all of my questions.
There is always going to be someone out there smarter than me, prettier than me, more athletic to me - just plain more than me. The struggle to see myself as enough, as the title says, is real. The big question is - enough for who or enough for what? I am a well educated individual and do my best to provide well thought out advice for my children and friends (if they ask). What I need to do is actually listen to myself and take my own advice. Sounds easy, doesn't it?!
How many of you out there can say you have sit on a therapists couch or in a chair in their office. I admit - I have. My last round of counseling there was something pointed out to me and looking back on this, maybe there is some truth to his observations. He said I was a perfectionist. I personally thought that was funny because there is absolutely no way I would consider myself anywhere near perfect. What I was overlooking is the definition of a perfectionist.
I looked up the definition on Google.com. "A person who refuses to accept any standard short of perfection." I think we are onto something. This also leads me back to a message I heard in church once and that message basically said, if you are constantly looking for the better job, better car, better house - you quickly lose sight of what better really is. I think these two concepts are quite similar.
When my therapist was pointing out this observation to me he drew me a diagram of the steps in my life. The struggles in my head on weight, appearance, intelligence. The constant need to find ways to improve myself. Here is another example of how the struggle is real. A person should never sell themselves short. Always be willing to learn more and never stop being the best you that you can be. This, my friend, does not mean you are not good enough. It simply means you want to be the best YOU.
In the grand scheme of life - it is only you that can approve of who you are. I have told my own kids that they should never try to be like someone else. They should focus on being the unique individual that was created to be them.
In my "research" today I was reminded how comparing yourself to others can kill your soul. There were so many different shortcomings to comparison but one stood out to me as really the biggest shortcoming - there is no end to the possible number of comparisons. As I said before - there will always be someone prettier, thinner, and smarter but there is nobody out there that can be a better you than YOU.
So - how do you overcome this detrimental trait of comparison? When I find that answer I will not only be at peace but I will be damn rich!
Only YOU can be the best YOU - don't let YOU be them because they are the best them they can be and YOU only need to be the best YOU that you can be.
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